Arguing

This post may anger some, in fact I’m almost sure it will, but it is not my intention to anger anyone. I just want to state an observation.


I usually follow a few message boards, but lately I have had to stop because of all the arguing on them was driving me crazy. And over stupid stuff, too. Some women seem so bent on making the other person feel bad that a war of words ensue. Nothing productive ever comes of it.

Since becoming a mom one of the things that I thought was true that turns out isn't true, is the "Women are the peacekeepers of the world" fallacy. That couldn't be further from the truth.

How did women get associated with being the peacekeepers? We fight so much between ourselves that we couldn't possibly speak about world peace without sounding hypocritical.

By now some women are reading this and saying, "Not I!" I agree, not all women are like this, but come on. All you have to do is read any message board that deals with kids and parenting issues. There are more "vs." between women than all the boxing matches. For example:

Breastfeeding vs. formula
Cry it out vs. not letting them cry it out
Cloth diapers vs. disposable
Co sleeping vs. crib sleeping
One child vs. large family
Spanking vs. non spanking
Vaccinate vs. not to vaccinate
Stay at home moms vs. working moms
Then of course within the working moms group is the part timers vs. the full timers
Home school vs. off to school
Public school vs. private school

It just goes on and on. Women argue over everything! No one can make a comment on these message boards without someone getting offended. It boggles the mind on how women disagree so much yet all have one main thing in common....they love their kids and want the best for them.

Of course, the differing of opinions is what makes us unique and everyone's point is valid, but with the age of instant communication have we have taken our need to be right too far? I mean, that is why people argue. We feel the need to announce we are right, the other person is wrong and we have to drive that point home. We argue to justify our position and feel the need to convert anyone against us over to our way of thinking. It is a fruitless endeavor that only brings friction, anger, hurt feelings and ultimately isolation.

We need to stop looking for reasons to be offended and celebrate in the one thing we have in common - our children who are watching us and learning from us how to interact with others. Boy, that's a scary thought isn't it? Our kids are watching us! Maybe I should start acting the way I want my child to see me acting.

How do you want your kids to see you acting?